Fr. Hector's message
Confronting the Addiction Epidemic with Compassion and Education
In Memory of Christian Querry (1995-2019)
This past February I faced one of the most difficult pastoral experiences of my priesthood when I received the tragic news of the passing of Christian Querry (23) after a seven year battle with drug addiction. In the midst of their darkest hour of grief, Maria and Mike, Christian’s parents, made the admirable and courageous decision to be transparent with the nature of their son's death, hoping to inspire parishioners and others to be more proactive in the area of addiction education and support. As a result of their vision, an “Addiction Education Fund” was established in memory of Christian to help our parish better confront the epidemic of addiction with greater education and support. Their courage allowed Fr. Alex Goussetis and me to eulogize their son in a more transparent way, so that we as a church can more effectively minister to individuals and families afflicted with the illness of addiction. As one parishioner astutely noted: “The Querry family's decision to be transparent about the issues Christian struggled with may well be their child's greatest legacy.”
Below, please take a moment to read an excerpt from the message delivered by Fr. Alexander Goussetis during Chrstian’s viewing on Sunday evening, February 17. On the following pages you may read the eulogy I delivered at his funeral the next day.
Excerpt from message delivered by Fr. Alexander Goussetis
During the Viewing of Christian Querry—2/17/19
Like many of you tonight, I have feelings of sadness, shock, and grief. But most of all I’m angry - and we should all be angry. Not at Christian; not at the Querry/Pavlakis family. But at sin. At the drug infested society we live in. Rather than passively witnessing this tragedy, we should all be collectively furious.
What will be our response to this senseless loss? Will it be gossiping and judging Christian? If so, I ask you to re-read the gospel from this morning’s liturgy – the parable of the Publican and the Pharisee found in the Gospel of Luke. The Pharisee, the well-educated Jewish expert who followed the letter of the Law of Moses, and was a respected member of society, was condemned by Christ in the parable because he judged the publican, the despised tax collector.
Every loss, every tragedy, every unfortunate event has the possibility of being transformed, transfigured. What will be our response – individually and collectively. I have four suggestions we might consider, just as a starting point:
- We can start by praying for the soul of Christian, who remains a child of God and created in God’s image.
- We can continue to offer our love and support to the Querry/Pavlakis family; not just tonight and tomorrow but in the coming weeks and months, when the full impact of this loss will take hold.
- We must educate ourselves on the medical and psychological and sociological impact of this dreaded disease.This parish is establishing an educational fund in honor of Christian to help us address every aspect of addiction. I encourage you to contribute to this fund and be open to the ways we must change our approach to this epidemic.
- We must arm ourselves spiritually.If we are Christians then we have voluntarily entered into a spiritual warfare with the demonic forces of this world. This is not superstition but a reality in the teachings of our faith.
But don’t take my word for it. Listen the words of St Paul in his letter to the Ephesians 6:10-18:
Be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his power. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For our struggle is not against enemies of blood and flesh, but against the cosmic powers of this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to stand firm. 14 Stand therefore, and fasten the belt of truth around your waist, and put on the breastplate of righteousness. 15 As shoes for your feet put on whatever will make you ready to proclaim the gospel of peace. 16 With all of these, take the shield of faith, with which you will be able to quench all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18 Pray in the Spirit at all times in every prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert and always persevere....
If the response to this tragedy is passivity, then we are sure to return here again and mourn the loss of another young person in our community. Let’s do our part so that Christian can be proud of us. May his memory be eternal.
Eulogy for Christian Querry
Delivered by Fr. Hector Firoglanis — 2/18/19
One of the most well-known and well-loved teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ is the Parable of the Good Samaritan. It is a parable that describes how we are to relate to our neighbor, especially to our fellow man who is in need of help. As we gather today to pray for the soul and remember the 23 years of life of Christian Querry, this parable of our Lord will shed light on the mystery of suffering, our responsibility to our neighbor, and how God provides what we need for our healing and eternal salvation.
Our Lord begins this parable by describing the journey of a man going down from Jerusalem to Jericho. According to St. John Chrysostom, Jerusalem sits at an elevation higher than Jericho and is symbolic of paradise – the natural state of harmony God intended for humanity in loving communion with Him and with one another.
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Such a paradise would characterize the early years of Christian, who was the first child born to his loving and devoted parents, Mike and Maria. In the words of Mike, Christian shared a close and special relationship with his mother. As a young child he would follow her everywhere and would sit on her lap twirling her hair as they read books together. He maintained this special bond of closeness and trust with his mother throughout his life.
Christian bonded with his father Mike from a young age through sports and reading bedtime stories together from a young age. When Christian was older, he and Mike went on a Father & Son trip together to the Notre Dame Spring football game. Lighting candles and saying prayers at the Notre Dame Grotto for Mike’s dad who had just passed away was a special memory. Christian compassionately put his arm on his dad’s shoulder to console him.
Christian adored his brother Ryan and sister Corinne, despite their 6 and 8 year age difference. Christian was so excited to have a baby brother, although he was disappointed when Ryan was born and couldn’t immediately catch a ball. As they grew older and Ryan caught up in height and strength to his older brother, Ryan confessed he still couldn’t beat his older brother in a game of one-on-one basketball. As all big brothers, Christian was protective of his baby sister, Corinne.
Christian was the first-born grandchild and, as described by Mike, he was doted on by his loving grandparents. He was their pride, joy and sunshine.
Christian was baptized and spiritually nurtured in this church, having gone through Sunday School, Joy and Goya, and serving faithfully in the altar. He played just about every sport there was to play as a student at Conestoga Valley, so it’s no surprise that he was very involved with Goya basketball as well. Although he was of smaller stature until he hit his growth spurt in high school, he was always a great ball handler and clutch shooter – and kept a calm and cool demeaner on and off the court. Christian was a quiet and gentle soul, polite and respectful to his teachers and elders, and kind-hearted towards his peers and friends. He was smart, athletic, gifted, and liked by all who knew him.
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But in the Parable of the Good Samaritan, the man does not stay in Jerusalem, but goes on a journey down to Jericho, which is 1400 feet below sea level. It is a symbolic journey from the heights of paradise to the lowest depths of this world.
During this journey, the man falls among robbers, who strip him, beat him, and leave him half dead on the side of the road. According to St. John Chrysostom, these robbers are the demons which ravage our souls and leave us spiritually dead.
This is the tragic turn of Christian’s life journey, when at some point he wandered from the paradise of Jerusalem down a dark road to Jericho. Some who take this road to Jericho are able to return to Jerusalem, but like millions of other young people, Christian was not able to make the journey back to his beloved parents and family.
The demons of addiction besieged him, stripped him of his former life and vibrancy, beat him down, and left him half dead on the side of the road.
Drug addiction afflicts an astounding one out of every six American young adults (between the ages of 18-25), a number that has doubled over the last 10 years.
Christian’s family experienced first-hand the paralyzing, destructive, and tormenting influence wrought by the demons of addiction on their son, brother, grandchild, and nephew, and they did everything humanly possible to rescue him from the clutch of this demon.
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But this is where Christian’s journey, the journey of his parents and family, becomes our journey as well. We all know that Christian loved sports, and Christianity is the ultimate team sport. But the Church is more than a team; it’s an army. It is an army of believers made up of angels, saints, and all of us in this life being led by Christ.
In the Parable of the Good Samaritan, our Lord Jesus Christ does not rebuke the man who was beaten and left for dead on the side of the road. No. Rather, He rebukes the apathetic response of the priest and Levite who heartlessly pass by the beaten man on the other side of the road. On this team of the Church and in this army of Christ, there is no such thing as a sideline Christian. If we are to beat the evil of addiction, the Church needs a team full of Good Samaritans.
Saint Anthony and other desert fathers from the fourth century have a saying: “Our life and our death is with our neighbor.” In the Church, Christian’s life is forever tied to each of our lives.
This is why, as the Church teaches us, we will continually pray for Christian and do charity on behalf of his soul. This charitable effort will start with the addiction education fund being established at our church in Christian’s memory. The best way to fight the demon of addiction is to equip and empower young people to avoid it altogether. For every young soul that is saved from the clutches of this demon, this act of love and charity through education will bring peace and comfort to Christian’s soul, and to our souls as well.
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In closing, let us remember the words of St. Paisios: “That no matter what happens, God will have the last word.”
Let us never forget that God is stronger than the demons of addiction and every other demon which attacks our souls. “God is love.” And death cannot sever the bond of love between Christians.
Let us honor the soul of Christian by becoming more like Christ – by becoming Good Samaritans in our ongoing struggle in the army of the Church against the evils of this world which torment the souls of our young people.
And let us entrust the soul of our brother, Christian, into the loving embrace of our Risen Lord Jesus Christ, where there is no pain, sorrow, or suffering, but comfort and everlasting life. And may his memory be eternal! Amen.
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Please consider making a donation to the “Addiction Education Fund” in memory of Christian Querry.
May his memory be eternal and help us to rally an army of Good Samaritans against the evil of addiction.